Mel! Complex and verbose as ever, here she is!! Fascinating article, thank you for writing this. I recently attended a psychoanalytic talk where one analyst was interviewing another famous psychoanalyst. The topic of childhood came up, then they started talking about their experiences with their own children, saying, "The more I think I know my child, they do something that makes me believe I don't know them at all."
The paradox in my observation is this: Why do we desire to skip the business of childhood and at the same time are so envious of children? Children are not mini adults, but sometimes are treated or expected to act like adults. Very upsetting and unhelpful. Perhaps, it is because children evoke such strong emotions in us. Children are real and can access the unconscious much more easily and quickly than we can as adults. Children are also highly sensitive to the struggles of their parents; they just know because of the whole psyche close to thing (you know?). Anyway, we all have both a psyche (mind in motion) and a childhood. I'll end with that. Trick or treat, always treat. And this sub was a treat (as always when it comes to your work)!
What comes up for me after reading this is the idea of continuity/discontinuity with that stage from childhood to adulthood. I definitely am finding my way in adulthood after periods of great discontinuity.
But a foundational phantasy we all find comforting is more continuous narrative. A below conscious wish for the younger folks in our lives to experience a little more continuity than we might have, without robbing them of the independence of finding their subjectivity in the necessary breaks in subjectivity continuity.
I definitely found some buried guilt for how I still carry the fantasy of continuity of childhood forward, but thankfully have the maturity to see that response with new eyes.
This piece really made me think, you're so right about how we proces these concepts. But I wonder if it's always about our own past, or also about modeling future societal structures?
Mel! Complex and verbose as ever, here she is!! Fascinating article, thank you for writing this. I recently attended a psychoanalytic talk where one analyst was interviewing another famous psychoanalyst. The topic of childhood came up, then they started talking about their experiences with their own children, saying, "The more I think I know my child, they do something that makes me believe I don't know them at all."
The paradox in my observation is this: Why do we desire to skip the business of childhood and at the same time are so envious of children? Children are not mini adults, but sometimes are treated or expected to act like adults. Very upsetting and unhelpful. Perhaps, it is because children evoke such strong emotions in us. Children are real and can access the unconscious much more easily and quickly than we can as adults. Children are also highly sensitive to the struggles of their parents; they just know because of the whole psyche close to thing (you know?). Anyway, we all have both a psyche (mind in motion) and a childhood. I'll end with that. Trick or treat, always treat. And this sub was a treat (as always when it comes to your work)!
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What comes up for me after reading this is the idea of continuity/discontinuity with that stage from childhood to adulthood. I definitely am finding my way in adulthood after periods of great discontinuity.
But a foundational phantasy we all find comforting is more continuous narrative. A below conscious wish for the younger folks in our lives to experience a little more continuity than we might have, without robbing them of the independence of finding their subjectivity in the necessary breaks in subjectivity continuity.
I definitely found some buried guilt for how I still carry the fantasy of continuity of childhood forward, but thankfully have the maturity to see that response with new eyes.
This piece really made me think, you're so right about how we proces these concepts. But I wonder if it's always about our own past, or also about modeling future societal structures?